Well, now you’ve done it. You’ve gone crazy. So crazy that you’re writing yourself a letter, on your own blog. But you’re doing it for very valid reasons. Because right now? You’re in the middle of thinking that everything is too much. That you’ve got too much on your plate, and you can’t handle it all.
Well, let’s talk about that shall we?
First of all, certification. Yes, you’re a little behind your goal. You have three weeks from Sunday until you leave for California, and you have five chapters left (not counting the one you’re currently in and for some reason TAKING FOREVER TO GET THROUGH…. ahem). You are lacking time to study because, for some reason, your darling almost three year old son is fighting nap time on an almost daily basis these days. And you don’t want to spend hours upon hours with your nose buried in a book while he’s awake. WHICH IS COMPLETELY UNDERSTANDABLE. Guess what? It’s okay. For a few reasons: 1) you have until August. You’re time doesn’t run out until then. So, stop, breathe, chill. You’re not behind schedule, you’re just behind your goal. Adjust. And 2) an hour at the kitchen table while Archer colors isn’t going to kill anyone. You have things you need to get done (just like laundry and dishes), and he loves to color. You’re right there, you can still talk to him, he can still play with you if he chooses. One hour. Try it. Not three, not 10 minutes, one hour. It’s okay. Really. You’re not ignoring your child.
Now, let’s talk training: yes, you skipped your ten miler on Tuesday. But. BUT! Self, shut up for a second and let me finish. BUT YOU GOT OUT THERE AND DID SOMETHING. You have been fighting a cold, you haven’t been sleeping well (see said cold) and you still got out there and did half of it. Not to mention you’re racing this weekend, and needed to feel better for that. ALSO: YOU DID THREE CLASSES YESTERDAY. Stop it. Sometimes things aren’t going to happen according to plans. You have to stop, breathe, chill, adjust. It’s okay. You’re still going to finish your half marathon in the time you set for yourself. You still have three weeks of long runs. You’re going to rock it. Because you know what? A YEAR AGO YOU COULDN’T EVEN GO THREE MILES. And now those are your short runs. Stop it. You’re doing awesome, and you’re amazing, and you CAN do it.
Self, sometimes we don’t have control over things. Sometimes things happen, and we can’t go according to plan. It’s better to stop, breathe, chill, and adjust so we don’t hurt ourselves, or others around us. Remember who you were a year ago? Remember how she was living in constant fear of everything and everyone around her? And how she was always waiting for the next bad thing to happen to her or her family? Remember how everything was dramatic, and sad, and she spent most of the day in front of a computer, in a fake world, ignoring her life? Remember that girl? Yeah… you’re not her anymore. You’re strong, and you’re capable. You’re determined, and you’re DOING IT. You’re doing all the things that you set out to do, you’re going BEYOND those things. And you’re HANDLING it.
Yes, you’re going to stumble along the way. Things happen. But that doesn’t mean you’re not successful. It just means you stop, breathe, chill, and adjust. So you have to wait another week or two to get certified… more practice. More confidence. More stuff to learn. More of a chance that you’ll pass that damn test the first time (fun fact: only 70% of people who took the test in 2016 passed on the first try). So you come in at 2:56:00 instead of 2:35:00…. you’re still under 3:00:00 which is the goal.
So. Self. Do yourself a favor please:
You’re doing amazing. And listen to everyone when they tell you how proud they are of you, how awesome you’re doing, how amazing and inspiring you are. And for crying in the rain… BELIEVE THEM. They’re your people. They wouldn’t just say it to you.
Your True Self.